Monday, April 13, 2009


Good Morning everyone.....
It is Monday, April 13, 2009, and it is 11:30 in the morning.
My thermometer outside reads 52 degrees. I am sooo ready for spring-ier weather and warmth. I don't generally mind winter, well, except when you are the recipient of the unexpected 'black ice' swishy-swerve across a small bridge covering a branch of the Rum River.
Most of the time I look upon winter as a time of re-grouping, nesting in, cozy times with a blanket and a stash of knitting, my passion of 30+ years in counted cross stitch, reading which is a life-long passion, etc., and in hubby's case, American Idol (Yuck-o) and not necessarily in that order.
After years of dreading the winter when having to work out in the unheated (except for the kilns) and uninsulated barn with our pottery, we no longer have to. Bobby's hands going through icy glaze or near ice clay has been a painful experience. So Winter has become a time of reflection for me.
I have cancelled many an appointment in the cities, 65 + miles to the south, this past winter. Not because I am a wimp, but because many of the cancellations have included my 93 year old Father in the blend of things. I will not put him at risk (more than the normal amount of risk required for transporting him in regular, maniac, stupid kids AND ADULTS comprising of and in general population of driving traffic) in extremely bad weather.
I have a small 'chick-pickup'...a 2000 Ford Ranger. I dearly love that little pickup and am constantly surprised to see men driving one. I will go on record here that it is the perfect truck for a female. Even a short little turd like me. The only thing that I am not fond of is the fact that the tail end is 'swishy' in icy or snowy conditions. But with the 4-wheel drive, and slower, reasonable speeds, I have made it home safely. The book says to not go faster than 45 mph when in 4-wheel and there have been speeds much, much lower in really bad weather for this driver.
Now with all this preamble, coming to the subject listed in the title.
On Hoda and Kathie Lee's program this morning, I caught a blurb from them of researchers trying to re-set a woman's biological clock so that women would be able to have children in her 70's and 80's.
Not that there haven't been times when I yearned for a fourth child with all the marvelous help and doulas and such, people out there now, I really think I object to that procedure.
I am 66, soon to be 67. My Mother has passed away at the age of 83, but my Father is still with us, as mentioned - 93. I call him every day to make sure he counts out the right number of meds and takes them at 7 p.m. to make sure he isn't getting too close to the morning meds, or gets confused as to take the morning meds again. My sister Dee has lovingly taken over the morning shift, as I simply cannot be a morning person, no matter how hard I try. He and I are conversing more now than in the previous 65 years. It isn't much, just what ever he wants to share of his day. Some days he rambles, some days he is still very clear. He mourned for the people in the Red River Valley between Minnesota and the Dakotas this spring. He remembers when his brother Hank and his wife (also named Helen) were living in Rochester, MN, and the floods would yearly flood his little doughnut store. Hank and Helen finally had enough and moved back to the cities.
If my Mother had the option of having myself (the oldest child of six) in her 70's or 80's, I would not be fortunate to have had the opportunity of coming to know my Father in his 90's. He can be exasperating at times, don't get me wrong, but most times lately since I have included him in my daily prayers, he is a delight. I can hear him 'toootlin' to the bedroom to retrieve his meds. He talks to the wall or doorway and telling it to 'stay' there, or he whistles (something that he is fairly good at), talks to me on the phone even though he has put the phone down on the table, or he sings and talks nonsense much like a mother does for her child. He comes back with the proper box and counts out the meds. He is always surprised that there are only four. He has ten in the mornings meds. Quite a feat for a 93 year old person. A lot of his meds are just 'fluff'....eye vitamins, calcium, senior vitamin, 81 mg aspirin, etc. Very few are for medical issues.
If he and my mother had had me, the first born, when they were in their 70's and 80's, I would have been robbed of the rich times they had when they were both young.....the few memories I have of my youth as in traveling with my Dad to deliver my Mother's apple tea rings for example. Watching my Mother make bread weekly. Mom struggling with the bills for a family of eight. She and I were not very close, and I sincerely regret that, but she tried her very best to make me an independent woman. My daughter-in-law Beth has a marvelous relationship with her Mom. She has often said that her Mom "Rocks". Sometimes the whole scenario of who your parents are is a big, if you will, crap-shoot. Parents do their best to raise their children as they were taught. My parents were brought up by very "Old World" parents. Dad was born in 1915 and Mom in 1917 to give you the timeline.
I think that science is making a big mistake here in extending the reproductive years for a woman. Sometimes scientists are superior in book-learnin', but not so much in common sense.
I am going on record here for people to object to this method of biological clock reversals. It just wouldn't be right nor fair for the child to be robbed of a steadying influence of a parent. I know there are parents out there that are nuts and really do not know how to parent a child, but so much more do. Leave it at that.
Huggs to all, CJ

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